Saturday, December 09, 2006

Top 5: Most Senseless Jobs

5- The Government employee that collects electricity money
50% of the time he doesn't find people at home and they end up paying by themselves. Not to mention he has to deal with children, maids and all sorts of people which is psychologically draining.

4-Guys who distribute flyers and adds in traffic stops
1st of all he’s distracting you with his movement back and forth, he probably hits the flyer in your face “I once had a paper cut from one of these jerks”, The principle is stupid because out of 100 flyers distributed to car drivers; while driving may I add, only 7-8 persons take a look, half of those are interested in the add itself, half of those will actually call the add owner.. So as far as strategic marketing goes, the owner of the add spent money for 100 flyers and the guy’s one day job salary to approach 1 client!!

3- The guy that parks your car "El menadi" a.k.a "El sayes"
The fastest growing occupation in Egypt, "El menadi" practically he's the guy that yells "left" and "right" and "that's it" when you park your car, meaning he "pretends" to help you park your car when 1- you didn't ask for his help, 2- he practically did nothing and 3- I won't give em a pound for a 30 seconds worth of "talk". But beware, he's not expecting a tip... he's expecting to be payed!

2-The guy that works on an elevator
For the Love of God, is it a profession to press buttons? The user of an elevator must be really stupid or really really lazy to actually need one. Not to mention he will grow to be a claustrophobic.

And finally... 1st runner up is

1-The guy/boy that works in a bathroom, handing you tissues!!
Only MEN can relate to that, The idea that a person is actually paying attention to you while you use the facility/urinal is creepy, not to mention that in his troubled mind he thinks that the faster he gives you a tissue, the better quality his services are...

plus he smiles at you after you do your business, I don't want to share a moment with you, you creepy creature, don't smile at me like I’ve just climbed the Everest, my sense of accomplishment does not include peeing or pooping !!

What kills me is that sometimes they wear formal cloth!!!!!


reham said...

as am a doctor and the only one giving you comments and as i am studying these days MBA in sadat academy , i have the honour to give you the following strategic planning for the "el sha7ata elli 3ala nasyet el share3":(the woman with a garbage begging for money on the street corner management plan):
1-swot analysis of herself:strenghth:i look poor,weaknesses:i have to loose weight as i am fat,opportunities:no menadi on the street corner and this area never been explored by other poors,threats:dr.reham with her looks , damn it !
2-as she did this analysis for herself and the medium around her , and as am the only threat, so what was her goal?
3-marketing goal:to pretend as if am working so that when dr.reham passes me by and as she was having a starring look at me before , so i will pretend to be selling kleenex but in real i will be begging for money:daily goal:100 le/day (she did a cross sectional analysis i guess,or benchmarking as there is some one begging for money gamb menatel)
4-she implement the plan and checks for the feedback:hah!abei3 kleenex! keda kewayess? ( i swear to god she asked me if it is oki now for me to sell instead of to beg)
5-as am not interested in her work,and as i do not give information for free, i gave her no feedback
6-so,her open system will then be closed as she is now can not make a connection with the external milieu
7-she studied the market again , made market segmentation ,has chosen a target market :she is begging now on the other side beside the lady begging beside the menatel , merging technique ;)

Mo'men said...

Dear god, a begger with a strategic marketing plan !!!
watch out for the new world order

as a doctor, why do you need to take MBA?

reham said...

new world order , this made me laugh out loud eh el demagh el 3alya dee, ana lamma 3amalt presentation wetkalemt feiha 3an this term"the new world order", mafeish 7ad fehem 7aga we lamma etkalemt 3an pearl harbor we hiroshima we nagazaki alouli reham balash tetkalemi fransawy welnaby wensi el mere de dieu shewaya,boss ya sidi ana bal3ab 3ala kol el 7ebal ,kol el hospitals with the new strategies that are now taking places and if we accept the change or not , we are entering a new era in hospital management and as am one of the managers at the hospital , so i have to follow the new lead and as the implementation of any plan takes time and as el ser2a hena masha2allah tet7esed and as en emdety will be put wana mesh 3awza ab2a 3amla zai el atrash fel zaffa , kan lazem afham ,so i took this step wallaho al mosta3an